by Rafael Nastase
This year is unique due not only to the pandemic situation, but also for political conflicts, and one of the most destructive bushfire from Australia. But for some, uniqueness of this year is given greater significance by the loss of someone dear from our family, a friend or a dear colleague.
I remember, at the end April, my brother called me informing I have to come to the southern part of Romania as my mother lost her fight with cancer. Due to pandemic restrictions, it was a strange and small funeral. I went back home with an emptiness in my soul.
Two months later, one of our collaborators called me. I knew her name from my phone book: she was the mother of one of my colleagues. Her voice trembling, she informed me that my colleague, her older son Radus, fell from a 100 meters cliff and died.
A couple of days later I was preaching at Radus’ funeral, remembering him taking the leadership baton from me and leading OM ministry for six months. I cry out to God, asking WHY?
Is “why?” a legitimate question?
This spring-summer, I learn that God is allowing me to ask why. I will not have the certainty that I will receive answers for my questions. But what’s making the uniqueness of losing someone, is the not the loss, but the metamorphosis which comes after – those mysterious moments, running from peace to agony; those moments when we can discover God like never before. Yes, for Christians, suffering is a mystery. Kierkegaard said: ”those who suffer have a common secret with God.”
God’s message to a deaf world
At Radus’ remembrance days, I remember that three days of ongoing fellowship and testimonies were not enough to speak about how greatly God was working through a short life of 30 years: from a high level medical student to skin donation to a person in need, from a midnight call counselling people in crisis, to a medical cabinet, there was God’s shade over him. I learned that trough loss, pain became “God’s megaphone to rouse a deaf world”(C.S. Lewis).
During loss, I also discovered that some people have high level of tolerance to pain. Meeting (apparently) so tender, soft and “weak” people facing the loss of a dear one, but having such resilience, it really amazes me. I realise is not our power to face tribulations, He is giving the power, because He “overcome the world” (John16:33).
Even though Jesus warned us “in this world we will have trouble”, I will continue asking “why?” and even though I might not understand His sovereign plan, I will be honoured to be His megaphone for this deaf world.
My prayer is that, in those “why moments” when I am asking to “take this cup from me…” (Luke 22:42), He will strength you and I to remain faithful in the midst of pain produced by loss.
This month’s blog is by Rafael Nastase of OM Romania
